January 26, 1999
The Aspen Herald Times Main Street Aspen, CO 81611
Dear Editor:
I dont like mayonnaise. In fact, I think its disgusting. I like good old ketchup and mustard on my hot dog. Some might consider me to be old fashioned, but I think its okay to say this.
Life can be difficult if you dislike mayonnaise. It seems like its the trendy condiment these days. Almost everywhere you go they automatically want to slather it on your meat. At parties its just assumed that youre cool with mayonnaise and they put it in everything. In some places its called special sauce, but that doesnt fool me. Its all the same thing. What is the crime in saying that you dont care for it?
This is not to say that I dislike people who enjoy mayonnaise. I have good friends who like it. They say that everyone probably has at least one friend or acquaintance who likes it. I dont know if mayonnaise lovers were born that way or if they acquired the taste. It doesnt really matter and that is not the point. They like it. I find it repulsive. Thats no reason why we all cant get along.
Besides, I dont care if anyone puts it on his or her own sandwich. I believe that whatever a person puts between their buns is their own business. But please, I dont need to know about it. What drives me crazy is others insensitivity to my dislike of mayonnaise. There are mayonnaise lovers out there who mix it all up with fruits and nuts and create a big gaudy show out of their feast. Thats fine in your own home but please, not where children and I can see it.
My point here is that if you like mayonnaise go ahead and eat it. Eat it in public. But be reasonable about it. A little on your sandwich is fine, but lately Ive been totally grossed out by people eating it by the spoonful right out of the jar in the mall. Yuk! And finally, please understand that it truly is okay to dislike mayonnaise. I cant help it. It makes my stomach turn just the way it makes your heart flutter. Thats just the way we are.
Sincerely,
Matt Jones Aspen
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