CHICKEN ADVENTURES
Most of my preliminary training in the finer aspects of farm life, included gathering eggs. Later I found this to be a better job, than it first appeared. Later came the clean out the chicken house job. This is an adventure every person should encounter. You learn to appreciate the other less meaningful jobs.
Gathering eggs the old fashion way, can be a challenge, especially when an old cluck doesn't care to part with her bounty. A pair of gloves can be very helpful trying to accomplish this task. I discovered that on occasion if I forgot my gloves, that a grab around the chicken's neck, and a quick pull will clear the nesting area quit nicely.
Still, this requires some skill, because she has sharp toe nails. It all must be accomplished in one complete motion, yanking her from the nest as quickly as you grab her neck. It was often easy to detect a cluck that had experienced this before. They seldom wait for you do it twice! I did wonder what if any effect, this had on the egg production. But, never dwelt on the topic very long.
It should be noted that this could be a very hazardous thing to do, unless you are positive the owner of the cluck is not in the immediate vicinity. As the cluck does not go quietly, She will become radical for a few moments, announcing her discontent to the whole barnyard.
Another experience I had was with an angered Rooster which had very long sharp spurs. The best defense, is to rid the farm of this hazardous material. This also must be done when you are positive the owner is not present, she should be completely off the premises.
My encounter was when I was whistling along minding my own business with other chores on my mind! (Probably not, but that's my story), when from out of nowhere this red, red combed critter, came bounding out with legs flying forward like some ballerina bouncing across a stage. I instinctively knew, this was no fairy dance, I headed for the cow lot as fast as a ten-year old's legs can go, I assure you! I was not moving like a ballerina. Over my shoulder this ballerina is still in hot pursuit. I not yet knowing that running from trouble is not always the best solution. Stopping abruptly will quite often stop the pursuer just as fast.
With just the perfect timing, I tripped on something and went face first in a pile of cow pie. This is something you do not relish to taste! I am really not sure if it was the abrupt stop, or the sight of me that made Old Red run the other direction. Or perhaps some of the noises I was making.
Regardless, this is when I developed the desire to take up the sport of hunting. Of course, I knew this decision had to be a secret mission. It would require precise timing on my part. Only when everyone was gone, could this be accomplished, so as not to have witnesses! Other than a few clucks of course!
It would also require patience on my part. And not so lethal defensive tools to protect myself until the clandestine mission, could be put into action. A hoe, shovel, rakes, clubs and any thing I could put my hands on fast, would be placed at strategic points, along my path doing chores. I had these all in place, when it came to me that perhaps I could carry the pitchfork along with me, and not seem suspicious. I could say I was going to clean up something or other. (Things it was designed for.) This idea would be ingenious, instant protection.
The opportunity for my plan, would play out about once a week, perhaps more depending on who was doing what and where?
Mom had to be away for some time, and Dad would either be driving the school bus or in the field at chore time. Perhaps Jim, the hired hand would be around also, except I had no worries about him! He didn't like Old Red any better than I did. But the less witnesses, the better.
The opportunity finally arrived, the old double barrel 12 gage Knickerbocker came off the rack, (4 shells should do the trick). I had practiced opening and loading it, I had not practiced shooting it. I placed a shell in each chamber. My hunting expedition begins! I did not need to go far, as Old Red was out next to the barn, a perfect spot. A wire fence separated the two of us! I just walked up to the fence and rested the tool on the fence. "It's a pretty heavy tool for a 10-year-old!" I knew I needed to carry out my mission rather quickly so as to have time to hide the remains.
I decided I'd stand a better chance with both shots at the same time. I sighted, down that double barrel cannon. The plan was to pull both triggers at the same time, but, I did not quite get this action synchronized. I was calm enough, you could say I was rather enjoying my moment of revenge. Squeeze the trigger slow, and hold your breath! I recalled hearing this bit of instruction from a cowboy radio show. Well I squeezed her off.
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