Excerpt

Part One
Hanging Out with Pop

Spending time with Nan and Pop never got old. I looked forward to being with them anytime, anywhere, and at any age. However, my twin sister and I had to share them. Our competition for Nan and Pops time and attention added to the already intense sibling rivalry.

Nan and Pop were careful not to play favorites, but that was nearly impossible at times, simply because of gender. Some things were for boys only. I cherished the chance to hang out with Pop alone. At times, we were clearly partners in crime.


Story 1: Gone Fishing

Starting when I was about eight years old, Pop took me to Atlantic City to go fishing. I couldnt wait each year for our annual fishing trip. It was fun to hook the bait and to operate the fishing pole. Usually, we rented a rowboat and set out to catch flounder or to go crabbing. Pop also had friends who owned small cottages located right on the water. Sometimes, we visited his friends and used one of their small engine boats. I preferred the rowboats because I got a chance to row sometimes.

We had a ball, just the two of us in the boat out on the water. Nan packed us lunch and wed stay out all day. I never let Pop know that I was frightened when he rocked the boat for the fun of it.

The anticipation of making a catch and reeling in a flounder or netting a crab was more than I could hardly handle. When it happened, Pops excitement and reaction was even greater. Thats it Vincie. You got him. Dont let him get away. Other boaters could hear Pops bellowing voice near and far.

However, even more memorable was another part of our fishing expeditions. On the way from Philly to Atlantic City, Pop let me drive. This meant that I sat on his lap and did the steering. Of course, he worked the gas, brake, and clutch pedals, since I couldnt come close to reaching them.

Can you imagine how exciting that was for me as a little kid? Can you also imagine doing that today with seat belt and child safety laws? Pop would have been thrown in jail for child abuse, child neglect, child endangerment, or something. Beyond that, Nan would have killed him if she knew he was letting me steer the car.

Pop was always sure to remind me that I shouldnt say anything about our little adventure. I enjoyed keeping the secret from the rest of the family. My sister would have been jealous and my parents would have been outraged. I was smart enough to know that if I ever said anything to Nan or my parents, particularly my dad, it was the last time I would get to drive. I was not about to squeal on Pops irresponsibly playful behavior. I had too much fun behind the wheel of the car.

Part Three
The Gift that Kept on Giving

People often say that they need more of two thingstime and money. Nan and Pop always had time for my sister and me. For that matter, they had time for anyone who needed it, but especially us.

In terms of money, Nan and Pop were far from well off, but they would find a way. Both would say, We may not be able to get it for you right now, but we will when we can. They always delivered on their promises. That doesnt mean they were careless and I got everything I wanted. I learned and practiced the lesson of moderation when it came to having a lot of stuff.

I also learned that generosity comes in many forms, both material and non-material. In that regard, Nan and Pop were spoilers. They put me before themselves. They are the most altruistic people Ive ever knowntruly kind, thoughtful, and unselfish. Nan and Pop were the proverbial gift that kept on giving, mostly of themselves.


Story 8: Dont Ask, Dont Tell

During high school and college, my parents didnt want me to work so that I could focus on schoolwork and extracurricular activities. It was a great luxury, but then I was fully dependent on them to pay for things. I also needed some spending money. I worked in the summer, but that wasnt enough to carry me through the school year.

Knowing my financial situation, Nan and Pop often gave me cash presents for birthdays and holidays. Being as generous as they were, they also tried to help at other times. They always attended family get togethers, my baseball games, and other functions that brought us together.

During many of these gatherings, Pop took me aside and slipped me a $10 or $20 bill along with the words, Dont tell Nan. Pop assured me that this was all right, as the money was his, and Nan didnt need to know what he did with it.

Then, a little while later, Nan made sure we were alone, and slipped me another $10 or $20, along with the words, Dont tell Pop. I guess Nan had her own money too.
While this was very humorous and endearing on their part, it was also very lucrative for me. But, for fear of breaking their trust, I didnt want to reveal to each what the other was doing. Hows that for an excuse to keep the money? The truth is I didnt want to end my gravy train. I needed the money.

To help rid any of my guilt, I always tried to give the money back. For me, are you sure? Do you really want me to have this? This is too much. My apologetic tone and alligator arms werent very forceful. Of course, Nan and Pop insisted that I keep the money and treat myself. I never had to ask, and I most certainly never told.