WHEN GRIEF ARRIVES Bible Reading: Genesis 37:1-28
Grief—how often it arrives as an unexpected intruder. And even when we anticipate it, we are never ready for its arrival. Imagine the abrupt change in Joseph’s life when an errand to check on his brothers resulted in being stripped of his colorful garment, thrown in a pit, and sold into slavery. The treacherous actions of Joseph’s brothers brought grief to both him and his father.
In February 1997, my personal encounter with grief began while conversing with my husband. Suddenly he stretched out his arm, reached toward his back, and blurted out: “Oh, the pain!” In seconds I was dialing 911. After several hours at a local hospital, I was told he had a thoracic aneurysm and needed to be transported to the Cleveland Clinic. I had no time to prepare for the days ahead. I would need to draw from the “living waters” of my personal relationship with God. I think Joseph had to do the same in his dilemma.
We can count on God to uphold us whenever we experience grief, but it’s best to build our relationship with Him daily. Doing so equips us to respond to His grace in life’s crises. As we discover more about grief in the devotions ahead, let’s begin by making sure our foundation is built on Jesus Christ, the One who can prepare us for grief’s arrival.
Prayer: Search my heart, Lord. I want my foundation to endure in times of grief. GRIEF AND SHOCK
Bible Reading: Genesis 37:29-36
We do not welcome grief in the beginning, for the reality of our hurt seems more than we can bear. Our body usually reacts by going into shock and many erect a wall of denial. At first this is a good thing, giving our body and emotions the necessary time to absorb our excruciating pain. Reflecting on Jacob’s grief in Scripture, we see a man tearing at his clothes, putting on sackcloth, and mourning many days for his son.
My heart ached following my husband’s death in May 1997, but my emotions seemed under control. A surge of energy erupted, allowing me to make legal decisions, have the grandchildren visit, paint, and complete yard work. However, as the leaves began to change color, my real feelings surfaced. It became difficult to pretend I wasn’t hurting, and stopping the tears was impossible. At first I didn’t recognize this as grief; I only knew I was weary and frightened.
Jacob’s reaction is understandable too. We wouldn’t expect him to accept lightly the news about his beloved Joseph. But Jacob becomes stuck in his grief, choosing to live in fear of loss instead of processing his pain. We see this in Genesis 42:4, 36-38.
Shock is our friend for a season, but if we do not face the reality of our loss, we are setting ourselves up for greater emotional pain. Grief must do its work.
Prayer: Father, I feel frightened and insecure. Help me face my real feelings and remember you understand my sorrow. STRUGGLING WITH GRIEF
Bible Reading: 1 Samuel 1:1-20
As cracks appear in the wall of our denial, our true feelings seep through, and we enter into grief’s struggle. Some of us have repressed our emotions for only a short time, others for years, leading to a lifetime of anger and depression. In our Bible reading we learn Hannah’s sorrow has been long term. She yearns for a child. Her husband questions her: “Hannah, why are you weeping? Why don’t you eat? Why are you downhearted?” (v. 8)
Struggling with grief affects us not only emotionally, but physically. Hannah is not hungry. Have you ever lost your appetite while grieving? I have. I have also been exhausted yet unable to sleep. In verse 10 Hannah wept we read: “In bitterness of soul Hannah wept much and prayed to the Lord.” Hannah was a woman of God with a broken and sorrowful spirit. How often it seems we too will crumble when we are confronted with our genuine feelings. And if we are misunderstood, as Hannah was, the way of grief becomes dark and lonely.
In the depths of my grief I recall crying out to God and journaling these words: Father, my heart is overwhelmed. I seem unable to stop the racing of my mind. Desperate thoughts threaten to trap me. I feel like I’m losing control. Come to me and quiet me in your presence. Remind me that you are with me. Teach me to rely on you for the unknown path ahead.
Prayer: Lord Jesus, I bring you my broken heart. Hold me and heal me in your way—in your timing. GOD’S GRACE FOR MY LOSS
At times it seems my loss, O Lord, Is more than I can bear; Until I humbly bow my heart And come to you in prayer.
While in the quiet I tell you all The things that trouble me; And then I hear you gently speak, “I see what you can’t see.
“The things that hurt you so right now They’re part of my great plan; I want your heart to find my rest, Not seek to understand.
“My Father’s love sometimes permits A pathway filled with pain; But rest assured I’m always near To work things out for gain.
“Just simply trust that in my love, I see beyond today; And always give my best to those Who trust me and obey.”
As I prepared to leave this place Where God and I oft meet, I knew once more His grace had met My need which was so deep.
Now I can go throughout my day Content to ere abide; In Him who fills my emptiness, While walking by my side.
“. . . My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. . . .” (2 Corinthians 12:9a)
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