A SMALL CANDLELIGHT BETWEEN THE DARKNESS by BETTY JEAN NOBLES 1,000 word excerpt
Carefully she searched within herself trying to remember how and why things happened the way they did. She wondered what role she played in the choices her son had made in the past. What did she do wrong? What could she have done better or differently? Had she been a bad mother? The more she pondered, the more intense she became as she thought about that awful day. She wondered how often Lorenzo thought about that dreadful day.
Ironically, hundreds of miles away in Staiffid, Pennsylvania, Lorenzo was in the prison yard attempting to workout. Everytime he got into his rhythm of doing push ups, his mind would wander. He halted his workout and looked up at the sky. He couldnt stop thinking about that awful day either!
It all began on a lazy hot Friday afternoon. No one thought much about it being Friday the thirteenth. This was South Philly, the place where Lorenzo grew up. South Philly is known as one of the hottest spots on the east coast. Even in the dead of winter you can find heat in South Philly, especially in the 2700 block of Milton Street. On this day as Lorenzo walked up Milton Street, it was particularly hot and humid. Its not that there was any kind of heat advisory projected by the local weather service. Temperatures across the rest of the city were lingering around eighty degrees. Lorenzo walked slowly, soaking up everything going on around him.
The residents of Milton Street finally noticed Lorenzo Tate. Damn, he sure was screening everything and everybody. It was noticeable to all of those who paid attention to what goes on that Lorenzo seemed to stiffen up his body in a real smooth way each time he walked up Milton Street. A walk up Milton Street could cause anyone to feel confined. It was like trying to walk in an elevator. You dont want to be in an elevator with an enemy.
Guys like Lorenzo always have enemies. Death threats are common in this neighborhood. The key factor here is who is making the threat. Lorenzos enemies were known as The Carps or to law enforcement as The Carpenella Street Gang or CSG. Some of Lorenzos family and closest friends were members of The Carpenella Family. Often they would stand around on the corners high fiving each other, chanting their stupid motto, Mo money, gits you mo honey!
These guys have no fear. They are ruthless. They truly own the streets. The Carps put a hit on Lorenzo. It wasnt clear to people on the street why Lorenzo was marked for death. But then, it wasnt supposed to be clear to anyone who wasnt a member of the Carp family. Lorenzo knew the rules of the game, the drug dealing game, that is. He broke the rules knowing full well that the thugged out, crazy, player-hating, jealous fools were out there waiting for this moment. Without a doubt, Lorenzo knew the consequences for breaking the Motherfuckn Carpenella Street house rules.
Lorenzo was nearly as ruthless as the rest of the Carps before everything went completely out of control between them. Lorenzo took thugging to another level. He was in the streets more than sixteen hours a day. His polite demeanor made him appear out of place among the other drug dealers, but if somebody deliberately tried to deceive him, his personality would change quickly to address the situation. He could become a monster if he needed to. Sometimes drug dealing was an ugly business. It takes its toll on all involved. It started to take its toll on Lorenzo. Everyday he had to be up close with the repulsiveness, the filthiness and the stench of drug addiction. It was beginning to turn his stomach.
At his home in East Oak Lane, Lorenzo had to lead a double life. He couldnt let his mother know what he was doing. But the drug game was calling his name like a crack pipe. Lorenzo started to look too much like a dope fiend or a drug addict himself. He was getting out of control. One day Myra went to Lorenzos room to talk to him. He had the door closed. Myra didnt knock. She suspected something was going on, so she barged right in. Instantly she saw him counting money from a small bag on his bed. The bag was bulging from the huge lump of cash. Lorenzo tried to hide it, but it was too late. Myra demanded that Lorenzo tell her what was going on. There was no point in lying to his mother. What's more, he was tired of sneaking around and hiding things from her. Tearfully, he told his mother that he was a drug dealer. Myra was crushed.
With a heavy heart, Myra asked her child to leave his home and his family. That was the most hard-hitting, heart-wrenching decision Myra ever had to make. Lorenzo had just turned eighteen. It was only a few months ago that she had tried taking Lorenzo to a mental health clinic for a screening. The doctor talked to Lorenzo for about 15 minutes. Then he came out and talked to Myra in front of Lorenzo. The doctor told Myra that she should trust her son more because he was fine and that she needed to let go and cut the apron strings. Without consulting anyone else, Myra thought that asking Lorenzo to leave the home would shock some sense into him. She knew that kicking Lorenzo out of the house would upset her entire household, but she didnt know what else to do.
Myra slipped back once more into thoughts of the past. She began to examine herself. The way she lived, her choices and the things that she exposed her young children to.
Myra thought about the times when she and Clifford would fist fight round after round with no referee in sight. Then, she thought about why she married him in the first place.
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